Change Yourself…Change The World.

New Beginnings
January 19, 2014, 1:26 pm
Filed under: India

It is 7:30 PM on a Saturday in South India, and I have decided to write again.

I took a break from blogging for many reasons. I felt bored with it. Writing in this exact same medium for the past five years- on ‘traveling and growing through the world’- started to lose its sheen even to me. The eagerness of sharing my experiences, which felt new and foreign for longer than it probably should have, started to feel dull after living for two years in the same place, as a Peace Corps Volunteer in Paraguay. I realized I was no longer the person I was when I created this- even though I wanted to be.

Discontent started to settle in that nothing could diminish- not the sense of duty I felt in helping those that wanted to delve into my same experiences, the excitement of growing readership, or the obligation to keep an account of my life that I could look back on over the years. Blogging became a chore, something to tick off a list of things to do. Initial pleasure at writing turned into anxiety as weeks and countless experiences slipped by that I could not motivate myself to share. So, I disconnected from the blog-o-sphere and from social media, and decided to re-discover the magic of India alone.

Five months into living in Delhi, I’ve recognized the importance of sorting out these experiences and putting the proverbial pen to paper. I feel refreshed and ready to start sharing again, though perhaps in a different format than before. The format is still being conceptualized to me, but I think it will be less of a “this is my account of my travels in the world,” and more of a “this is an account of my life, whatever it may be.” I like to think that my writing has always been honest, but this will be more honest. I like to think that my writing has been personal, but this will definitely be more personal. The shackles of writing about myself on such a public forum for all of the world to see don’t seem as heavy as they used to, even if they probably should.

I will not hold myself to writing once a week as I did, and ultimately didn’t follow, in the Peace Corps. I want everything that comes out to be natural, raw, and real in the moment. Perhaps that could come out as three posts in one year, or three posts in a day. I will not hold myself to trying to grow my website or strategize ways to grow my readership. It was always something I toyed with, never ultimately took any action on, and have decided now to not move forward with. This is a lovely hobby that I enjoy immensely, but do not feel obligated to.

There may be some changes, but I am confident that they will be positive ones. The bottom line is, I am back to the blogging world, and it feels like a new beginning.

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